Ian and Hope

To the depths of my being, I do not know what I would do without these two. They read my earlier post and, even though they were exhausted and so ready for bed, they showed back up on my door step with a teapot, tea and honey demanding entrance. They turned on a light and set to work.
All the while, I just laid there. Mumbling the words to songs that were playing on my iHome. Ian even did all my dishes, god bless him.
Neither of them pushed me or asked me to talk, which would have been the worst possible thing right then.
When the tea was done, they commandeered my Xbox and put on the lion king. Ian made me sit up in the middle of the couch so he and hope were on each side of me. They cuddled, hugged me, patted my head (in a loving, non condescending way) and still didn’t try to make me talk.
We sat thru every preview and made little comments about them. As we did that, I could feel my mood shifting. Improving.
Basically, my night would have been a lot worse without them.
They will probably see this post. If you guys read this, just know that I love you dearly. I’m not sure how you two have become two of my best friends in such a short amount of time, but it’s happened and you’re stuck with me :)

Pity Party

I seriously hate when I’m having a good night with old friends, chilling, drinking, eating good food and then, out of nowhere my mood goes to shit. I start to withdraw and I’m afraid to talk to anyone about anything because I’m on the verge of tears and I legitimately do not understand why. It ruins my night. Then my friends get worried. And I don’t know how to explain. It’s like teenage angst all over again. I feel lonely and secluded even though no one is excluding me. It’s just…I have this great life. I know that. But I don’t have anyone to share it with. I have friends yeah, and they are happy for me. But I don’t want to go on and on to my friends about how great my life is. I want to go on and on with someone who truly loves me as deeply as I love them about how great OUR life is. Because we are sharing a life in all the ways that matter.
I’m not saying I want a relationship where we are stuck up each others asses. We’d have our own shit too. But at the end of the day, he or she would be there, ready to cuddle with me and bask in each others happiness.
I just feel so hopeless sometimes.

(Source: analizzette, via lalalunascope)

(via 10knotes)

(via hopeaaron)

allthingseurope:

Ponte Sant’Angelo, Rome, Italy (by Antonio Torres Ochoa)

allthingseurope:

Ponte Sant’Angelo, Rome, Italy (by Antonio Torres Ochoa)

(Source: rdjsaidwhatnow, via 10knotes)

(Source: relatablegifs, via hopeaaron)

(Source: weheartit.com, via everxmore)